Dating is a tricky business and while women may think that it is good looks and a hot body that has the opposite sex doing all the chasing, the reality is a lot more complicated.
Attracting a man should be simple, right?
We spoke to leading dating guru Hayley Quinn (www.hayleyquinn.com), who has shed some light on the subject for us. As well as teaching 10,000 men how to seduce women, she regularly features on dating programmes about all things to do with love, dating and relationships.
Hayley says that dating successfully is all about communication.
‘What attracts men? Well it’s not the high heels, not replying to his texts for days, or waiting for him to make all the moves. Men like women who know what they want, and communicate it clearly. So scrap the mind games, and instead work on being approachable, communicative and confident.’
Erm, hang on a second, are we not supposed to play hard to get? Even a little bit?
Hayley advises: ‘It is a total myth that men love the chase so much that you ignoring his calls is only going to make him want you more – in fact (poor him) he’ll probably just think you’re not that interested and give up.
‘Men don’t have rock solid resilience to you being all unattainable, nor are they so devolved that they’ll “respect you more” if you show them who’s boss by blanking their texts.
And rather than spend hours agonising over what to write in a text message, don’t worry.
She adds: ‘Any guy who would judge a girl on how soon she texts, kisses or agrees to a date with him is probably not worth having anyway! From my years working as a London dating coach I can safely say that men have a bad reputation for being wired super simply.
‘Sure they may go a little gooey eyed when Megan Fox comes on TV but that’s not usually on his agenda when he’s looking for a girl to date regularly.
‘A big smile definitely helps, but guys love women who are approachable, warm, friendly and have great self-esteem. Not girls who necessarily have a modelling contract with Select.’
She says the key is to be confident with who you are, as this is sexier than anything else.
‘Now that doesn’t mean you have to be so confident that you make Rihanna look like a wimp, but women who know their own minds, and are cool to go after what they want (without yelling at anyone, or being bewilderingly distant in the process) are automatically sexy.
‘Because it’s not the Megan Fox lookalike in the room who’s truly sexy, it’s the woman who knows she’s sexy. Sexy because she’s smart, at peace with herself, and knows that there’s nothing unfeminine about going after what you want in life.’
Do you agree with Hayley? Tell us @lovestruck
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