“I can’t make you love me….” crooned George Michael. Wanna bet? We don’t give up that easily here at Lovestruck. So just how do you turn Mr ‘I Don’t Know’ into Mr ‘Never Let You Go?’
With these 4 handy love-inducing tips. Ladies, George, these are for you….
#1 Don’t give a S***
Huh? Yep, we really did say that, sorry mum. So often we hear that good relationships require time and input from the outset. Newsflash! Don’t waste your time. Thousands of years of men being programmed to hunt hasn’t really changed if we’re honest so they don’t want a girl who rolls over at the first whiff of a relationship. We’re not saying play games, who has the time, frankly, we’re simply saying don’t change from your sassy, fun, witty or astute self to become a simpering date softie, even if he is a sizzling hot pot and you’re bubbling over at the fact you’re dating.
Keep your plans, friends and life going strong. Obviously don’t deliberately refuse dates out, but remember, he is new to your world and he’s not earned the right to jump to the top of it quite yet. Trust us, you won’t lose him if he likes you. He’ll just work to make himself a priority in your life and he’ll kinda love you for it.
#2 Emotional connection:
It’s a misconception to think men don’t want to communicate on an emotional level. Peel back the layers and hell, who hasn’t got more baggage than the hold of a Boeing 777. Obviously don’t blub and pour your heart out on date one or two as this might have him moon-walking swiftly towards the exit, but here’s the thing. You need to really connect on an emotional level rather than just enjoying being in each others company every time you meet. You’re not a mate – they’ve got mates already. Men love it when they feel a woman really ‘gets them’ so how do you do that?
The good news is, you don’t need a Psychology degree, honest. Be in tune with your feelings and emotions first. Not all men are as comfortable pouring their hearts out like us females can do so don’t force his feelings out with a verbal crowbar of questions. You really just need to listen and get inside his male head. Yes it’s different to yours (eew and what’s that doing in there) but don’t be judgmental or critical. Offer light advice and share your views and open your heart in a way that challenges or inspires how he feels about himself and you. Make him feel his feelings. Bingo! This is an emotional connection. It’s kind of a big deal because lust stage aside, this is really getting to know each other and it’s a connection he’ll share with you and won’t want to be without, long-term.
#3 Don’t over think it:
Sometimes, us women over think stuff. We can’t help it, we’re wired up like a computer to have a thousand ‘open windows’ in our brain at any one time. This can be great in life or work but not always so in a relationship. The reality is that if you open up his brain at the early stages to peek inside, he’ll have just one window open simply stating that ‘he likes you.’ Now you need to turn ‘like’ into ‘want.’ That means being your very best self when you’re together and not saying what you think he likes to hear because you read he likes it on his profile. You’re saying ‘I like you, but this is MY world, this is the real me. I have great friends, family, hobbies…I’m funny, vulnerable, weird sometimes, but come on in.
#4 Great sex won’t do it
Well, OK, it does in the beginning but if we’re talking about him falling head over heels in love with you long-term, you need to up your mental game because great sex alone won’t keep him. He can get great sex from lots of girls. You need that emotional connection we talked about, focus on getting into his head rather than his Calvin Klein’s (or other fancy pant brands) otherwise, you’ll just become a ‘sex buddy’ while he’s waiting to find the ‘real’ love of his life.
And guys, if you’re feeling left out, we’ll be back soon with how to make the ladeez love you too.
Good luck! We’re smitten already…
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